We often look to comfort and convenience as a path to
happiness and harmony. Professor
Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (pronounced "chick–sent–me–high-ee"), renowned
for his investigation on well-being and happiness, has found we feel best
when we are in a state he calls “Flow.”
We have all experienced Flow in some form or another. This
has been the object of
Csikszentmihalyi's research for several dec ades.
For some, Flow occurs several times a day; for others, it is more elusive.
We achieve Flow when we are so involved in an activity we become totally
engaged and immersed in it. It’s common when we are in this state to lose
concept of time and of our basic necessities like hunger, sleep, and even
sexual desire. Achieving this state, according to
Csikszentmihalyi, is the surest road to well-being and happiness.
These findings go against what we often believe to be true
regarding our perception of happiness. Let’s look at an example. Right now
each of us has a list of “to do’s.” If your list is anything like mine, it
seems endless!
We mistakenly believe if we could just finish or somehow get
rid of each item on our list we would magically find happiness. This isn’t
the case for several reasons. When we are about to finish the last item on
our list, several more items magically appear. Even the day we die we will
have a list of things to do. The list never ends; nor should we want it to
end because that will truly be the day we meet our own end!
“Finishing” our list does not lead us to happiness because we
are generally happier moving towards a goal or an objective.
Facundo Cabral has
a wonderful way of stating this idea:
“The journey is more exciting than the destination, if it’s
possible to get anywhere at all…”
This journey implies overcoming challenge to guide us towards
what we most desire. This truth coincides with
Csikszentmihalyi's work, which indicates we are happiest when we strike
a balance between the difficulty of a task and our ability to perform it.
This is precisely when we enter Flow.
It’s common to think relaxing in front of the television in
the comfort of our home will bring happiness. While it may bring temporary
relief to help us recharge our batteries,
Csikszentmihalyi's research, which included hundreds of thousands of
people, shows it is not in this state when we are happiest!
So then,
What can
we do to be happier?
When we are directors of our own fate we are more content. We
can take action today to write words, sentences and pages which encompass
our own book of life. We can reach beyond our grasp and establish goals and
objectives which require we stretch beyond our comfort zone.
With few exceptions, what we all want in some way, shape or
form is to be happy. All we do and all we say is directed to enhance our own
happiness or to affect the happiness of another, though we may not always
affect them in a positive way! I know of no one who wakes up in the morning
and says, “I want to be a miserable good-for-nothing failure full of anguish
and pain.” I have, however, met many whose actions lead them to this end.
“The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in
moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of
challenge and controversy.”
Flowing through Challenge implies welcoming change as well as
the trials and tribulations we face daily. Life is not a pro blem
to be resolved; rather, it is a challenge to be embraced. It is often
difficult to see challenge as something outstanding, marvelous and splendid
which drives us to our desire. Challenge should never be perceived as
something horrendous, horrible and hateful which hinders our progress.
As we mature and age, it is unlikely we will recall endless
hours spent in front of the television relaxing. Nor will we likely remember
what we achieved with little or no effort. What will stand out as a
magnificent monument to our life, and will likely become the stories we tell
our children and grandchildren, are those challenging, uncomfortable
situations we were able to overcome with courage and dignity.
Life is a collection of moments, intervals in time which give
meaning and form to our existence in this wonderful world. It is the simple
things which most often give sensational significance to our experience.
When we "Flow through Challenge" we take a flying leap towards directing a
life full of moments which give sense, significance, and substance to each
instant.
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